While this is blatant self promotion, I'm posting it on my blog to show newbies how to write an effective newsletter. And so far, this one has proven effective.
1. Join http://www.ymlp.com and place an opt in/opt out box on your website to build a mailing list. It's reasonably priced, easy, and does everything for you.
2. Make sure your newsletter is about what you have to offer, not what you have to sell. Like a website, it should impart information and entertainment. Yes, you should mention your latest projects. But contests and freebies also make it viral, causing your recipients to share it with others.
3. Make it brief. Get to the high points, and get out. The fewer newsletters you do per year, the longer you can be, but try to make it readable in under three minutes. I do two or three newsletters a year, and I think that's plenty. Also be gracious, and if possible, funny.
4. Send it during business hours on a weekday. Many people have computers at work, and welcome a mini break. Also make sure you're at your computer when you send it, so you can respond to the barrage of replies you receive.
5. Make sure it contains links, then track those links to monitor your effectiveness. After you read the newsletter, I'll post at the bottom what worked for me.
----------
Straight Up - The Official Newsletter of Author J.A. Konrath/Jack Kilborn
In this issue:
--Introduction
--Afraid
--Free Book
--Jack Daniels News
--Writing Contest
--Afraid Tour
--More Joe
--Freebies
--INTRODUCTION
You're on this mailing list because you love books. I love them, too. This email is my way of reaching out to readers, librarians, bookstore employees, and fellow authors, in order to give you free stuff. If you want to be taken off this list, you can opt out using the link at the bottom. If you've asked to be removed from this newsletter and haven't been, I apologize. If you've signed up for this newsletter and haven't received it, you probably aren't reading this, but I apologize anyway.
Now let's get to the fun stuff:
--AFRAID
For those who haven't been paying attention, I wrote a horror novel under the pen name Jack Kilborn. The book is called AFRAID. It's coming out next month, in paperback and audio. Here's the basic premise:
###
ARE YOU AFRAID OF THE DARK? YOU WILL BE...
Welcome to Safe Haven, Wisconsin. Miles from everything, with one road in and out, this peaceful town has never needed a full-time police force. Until now...
A helicopter has crashed near Safe Haven and unleashed something horrifying. Now this merciless force is about to do what it does best. Isolate. Terrorize. Annihilate. As residents begin dying in a storm of gory violence, Safe Haven's only chance for survival will rest with an aging county sheriff, a firefighter, and a single mom. And each will have this harrowing thought: Maybe death hasn't come to their town by accident...
###
You can read more about it, and play the AFRAID Flash game, at http://www.JackKilborn.com .
--FREE BOOK
AFRAID is being released March 31, but my savvy publisher, Grand Central, is giving 50 of my fans (that's you) a chance to get the book for free.
Yes, I said free. A real, honest to goodness book, at zero cost.
How do you get one?
In case you haven't noticed (and you should considering you're reading this via email) the Internet has become a wonderful marketing tool for authors.
So if you want to get a free paperback copy of AFRAID, I'd like you to use the Internet to help spread the word about it.
We're looking for fifty bloggers to post their reviews of AFRAID. These reviews must be at least 75 words long. It's even okay if you post a negative review about how violent and bloody the book is--I'm fine with that, as long as you hit that 75 word mark.
Along with the blog review, I'd like you to post your review at least one other place on the Internet. Some of the obvious choices are Goodreads.com, Shelfari.com, Booksnbytes.com, Amazon.com, Borders.com, BN.com, Librarything.com, Booksamillion.com, Yahoo groups, DorothyL.com, etc.
How do you enter?
1. Email me at haknort@wowway.com with the heading SCARE ME!
2. Include your snail mail address, the URL to the blog where you'll post the review, and tell me which review websites you'll post on. It will help your chances if you to promise to post on several sites.
3. Tell me how much you love me. I dig it when people suck up. It makes me feel like Brando in Apocalypse Now.
That's all. Fifty people who follow those easy instructions will get free books. Perhaps even more than fifty, if the response is overwhelming.
How cool is that?
--JACK DANIELS NEWS
The sixth Jack Daniels thriller, CHERRY BOMB, will be out in hardcover and on audio on July 7. The cheap paperback version of the fifth Jack Daniels novel, FUZZY NAVEL, will be out a few weeks prior to that. But you should have already purchased that in hardcover, you cheapskate.
If you need a Jack Daniels fix right now, you have some options.
MISSING, an anthology edited by Amy Alessio for Echelon Books, features a Jack Daniels novella co-written with Henry Perez, author of the soon-to-be-released thriller KILLING RED. In our story, FLOATERS, Jack tag teams with Henry's character, Chicago newspaper reporter Alex Chapa. Visit http://www.henryperezbooks.com/HP_STORIES.html to read about it and find out how to get it. The profits are going to charity, so buy fifty copies and then write it off on your taxes.
SHOT OF TEQUILA, an unpublished crime novel by me that takes place in 1993 and co-stars a very young Jack Daniels, is now available as an ebook download on my website. Visit http://www.jakonrath.com/tequila.htm for the secret details.
LIKE A CHINESE TATTOO by Bill Breedlove, an anthology which features Jack's ex-partner, Harry McGlade, in a novella called THE NECRO FILES. It's waaaaay over-the-top, and probably shouldn't be read by anybody. Jack is in it, too.
In July, Bleak House Books will release UNCAGE ME, edited by Jen Jordan. It also features Harry McGlade, in a short called SCHOOL DAZE.
There's nothing yet to report on the Jack Daniels movie. We may be having trouble selling it because I'm demanding to play Jack. I also insist on directing, editing, and composing the score, which I'm doing entirely on xylophone. If you're interested in buying the rights, contact my agent.
--WRITING CONTEST
On my forum http://www.jakonrath.com/phpBB3/ I'm holding a bad poetry contest. Sign up and post your drek. The winner gets a gazillion trillion dollars, or a free signed book, my choice. Contest ends on March 8.
--AFRAID TOUR
I'll be cruising around Illinois, Indiana, Wisconsin, and Michigan, signing copies of AFRAID this April. Watch my website for where and when.
--MORE JOE
For you rabid fans who insist on buying everything with a Konrath story in it (hi Mom), here are two of the latest publications:
WOLFSBANE & MISTLETOE by Charlaine Harris and Toni L. P. Kelner, featuring my werewolf novella SA, which may be the funniest thing I've ever written.
BLOOD LITE by Kevin J. Anderson, featuring a story I wrote with F. Paul Wilson called THE SOUND OF BLUNDER, which may also be the funniest thing I've ever written.
--FREEBIES
Free stuff is cool. A few times a year I have a random drawing for free J.A. Konrath merchandise, and everyone on my mailing list is eligible. Three newsletter subscribers have been randomly picked to receive some cool gifts.
The lucky winners this time are:
goodman.carrie(at)gmail.com
debra.suto(at)fumch.org
kathyboat(at)bellsouth.net
Email me to get your swag. And keep an eye on JAKonrath.com for updates and news.
See you on the road!
Joe
http://www.JAKonrath.com
http://JAKonrath.blogspot.com
http://www.facebook.com/people/JA_Konrath/679343992
http://www.myspace.com/jakonrath
http://www.twitter.com/jakonrath
-----------
In a nutshell, pretty much everything I wanted to work, worked. My Amazon numbers of all my books, including the anthos, spiked.
I got triple my average daily hits on my websites.
I got more than fifty people who want to blog about AFRAID in exchange for a free book (and more keep coming--feel free to send me an email if you're interested.)
I sold more copies of SHOT OF TEQUILA, and Sheila is very close to being saved.
A newsletter is one more weapon in your self-promotion arsenal. Use it wisely, and it can be an effective one.
Jumat, 27 Februari 2009
Rabu, 25 Februari 2009
Confident or Delusional?
Kissinger was wrong. Power isn't the ultimate aphrodisiac.
Confidence is.
Confident people attract others. They get things done, spending more time doing and less time worrying. Confidence fosters charisma, inspires allegiance, and demands attention.
All writers need to be confident. We must believe our work is worthy, that our efforts aren't in vain.
But what are the differences between confidence, and its ugly step-sister, delusion?
Confident writers know they'll be published, if they keep at it.
Delusion writers think they'll be rich and famous.
Confident writers work to get the words right.
Delusional writers think they got the words right the first time.
Confident writers expect to be periodically rejected.
Delusional writers are shocked every time someone fails to recognize their brilliance.
Confident writers take suggestion.
Delusional writers believe their words are written in stone.
Confident writers work even when it's hard.
Delusional writers believe they need to be inspired first.
Confident writers know this is a job.
Delusional writers think this is a vacation.
Confident writers know there's a never-ending learning curve.
Delusional writers believe they've learned all they need to know.
Confident writers know when to move on, and learn from their failures and successes.
Delusional writers keep doing the same things, over and over, hoping for different outcomes.
Confident writers know luck plays a big part.
Delusional writers think there's a conspiracy against them.
Confident writers get published.
Delusion writers don't get published very often, and if they do it's not for very long.
Confident writers work within the system, even though the system is flawed.
Delusional writers work outside of the system, even though they long to work within the system.
Confident writers understand their limitations.
Delusional writers don't believe in limitations.
Confident writers understand sacrifice.
Delusional writers demand everything on their terms.
Confident writers believe in persistence.
Delusional writers believe in talent.
Confident writers believe they owe the world.
Delusional writers believe the world owes them.
Are you confident or delusional?
Chances are high the delusional people will believe they're confident, since self-awareness is in short supply in the writing community.
Here are some questions to ask yourself.
Have you been published by an impartial third party?
Confident writers eventually get traditionally published. Period.
Do you seek out and apply editing advice?
Confident writers know their words can always be made stronger.
At what point do you abandon a project and begin a new one?
Confident writers move on, but first they try to figure out what didn't work, and why.
Would you rather be paid or be praised?
Confident writers know the best form of praise is a royalty check.
Do you help other writers?
Confident writers know it's about what you put in, not what you get out.
Do you understand your failures?
Confident writers don't have failures. They have learning experiences that make them stronger.
Will you be successful?
Confident writers know success is beyond their control. But they keep writing anyway, and will continue to even if success never happens.
It's not about the destination. It's about the journey.
You must believe in yourself.
But first you have to prove yourself worthy of that belief.
Confidence is.
Confident people attract others. They get things done, spending more time doing and less time worrying. Confidence fosters charisma, inspires allegiance, and demands attention.
All writers need to be confident. We must believe our work is worthy, that our efforts aren't in vain.
But what are the differences between confidence, and its ugly step-sister, delusion?
Confident writers know they'll be published, if they keep at it.
Delusion writers think they'll be rich and famous.
Confident writers work to get the words right.
Delusional writers think they got the words right the first time.
Confident writers expect to be periodically rejected.
Delusional writers are shocked every time someone fails to recognize their brilliance.
Confident writers take suggestion.
Delusional writers believe their words are written in stone.
Confident writers work even when it's hard.
Delusional writers believe they need to be inspired first.
Confident writers know this is a job.
Delusional writers think this is a vacation.
Confident writers know there's a never-ending learning curve.
Delusional writers believe they've learned all they need to know.
Confident writers know when to move on, and learn from their failures and successes.
Delusional writers keep doing the same things, over and over, hoping for different outcomes.
Confident writers know luck plays a big part.
Delusional writers think there's a conspiracy against them.
Confident writers get published.
Delusion writers don't get published very often, and if they do it's not for very long.
Confident writers work within the system, even though the system is flawed.
Delusional writers work outside of the system, even though they long to work within the system.
Confident writers understand their limitations.
Delusional writers don't believe in limitations.
Confident writers understand sacrifice.
Delusional writers demand everything on their terms.
Confident writers believe in persistence.
Delusional writers believe in talent.
Confident writers believe they owe the world.
Delusional writers believe the world owes them.
Are you confident or delusional?
Chances are high the delusional people will believe they're confident, since self-awareness is in short supply in the writing community.
Here are some questions to ask yourself.
Have you been published by an impartial third party?
Confident writers eventually get traditionally published. Period.
Do you seek out and apply editing advice?
Confident writers know their words can always be made stronger.
At what point do you abandon a project and begin a new one?
Confident writers move on, but first they try to figure out what didn't work, and why.
Would you rather be paid or be praised?
Confident writers know the best form of praise is a royalty check.
Do you help other writers?
Confident writers know it's about what you put in, not what you get out.
Do you understand your failures?
Confident writers don't have failures. They have learning experiences that make them stronger.
Will you be successful?
Confident writers know success is beyond their control. But they keep writing anyway, and will continue to even if success never happens.
It's not about the destination. It's about the journey.
You must believe in yourself.
But first you have to prove yourself worthy of that belief.
Rabu, 18 Februari 2009
Tequila for Sheila
I lost a loved one today.
People close to me know all about Sheila. My friends, family, and peers have met her on many occasions. Sheila gave me comfort and reassurance. She gave me peace of mind. But most of all, she gave me direction in life. We've had many good years together.
My wife killed her. It wasn't jealousy. It was negligence. She shoved Sheila into the glove compartment and cracked her touch screen.
Sheila was my GPS unit, a Garmin c330.
Way back in 2005, I was one of the first authors to use a GPS on a book tour. I preached incessantly about how every writer needed one, and many peers bought their own at my insistence.
But now, Sheila is cracked and useless. No more will I hear her tell me to turn left in 200 feet. No more will her sweet voice say she's lost satellite reception. No more, when I veer off course, will she replot my route while chiding me with her terse, "Recalculating."
Personally, with all the free publicity I've given Garmin, I think they should buy me a new one. But, alas, my calls have gone unanswered.
Which leads me to you, my fans and blog readers. I want you to help me get Sheila back.
While it would be cool if some uberfan just sent me a new GPS, I'm too jaded to believe that will happen. I could just spring for the $80 to get her fixed, but that would deny me the opportunity to try an experiment.
Readers of this blog know how I love experiments. The Internet is a fantastic source of information and entertainment, and it's also a way to make money. But few writers have been able to fuse the two.
So here's what I propose.
I've begun a Save Sheila fund. If you've ever benefited from my blog, or enjoyed my writing, I'm humbly asking you to donate 99 cents by clicking on the button below. It will lead you to my website, which will allow you to donate using PayPal.
PayPal is safe, free, and most people already have an account. If you don't, it's free to sign up for one at www.PayPal.com. The direct link to the donation page is http://www.jakonrath.com/tequila.htm.
Naturally, I don't expect anyone to give something without getting something in return. In fact, I don't expect anyone to give me anything no matter what they get in return. But this is an experiment, and I'm interested to see how it turns out, so I'm giving it a shot.
Everyone who donates 99 cents to the Save Sheila fund will get an ebook from me, emailed to them.
"But Joe," you're probably saying to yourself, "you've already got several free ebooks that can be downloaded on your website. Why should I give you a buck when I'm already getting the freebies?"
Because, dear reader, I'm offering to give you an ebook that isn't on my website.
I wrote nine unpublished novels before landing a book deal with my first Jack Daniels thriller, Whiskey Sour. Three of these novels are available for free on my website, www.jakonrath.com. Many times, readers have clamored for my other unpublished work, and I've always rebuffed them, claiming my early books aren't fit for human consumption.
Well, I've been lying. One of those earlier books is decent. And fans of my Jack Daniels novels might find it interesting, because it has Jack Daniels in it.
The book is called Shot of Tequila. I wrote it in 1997. It's a crime thriller. I actually had an agent who was interested in it, but he ultimately passed, saying it had too much action in it.
I know, I don't understand that comment either.
In 2008, I reread the book, and was surprised to find out it was pretty good. So I rewrote some scenes, polished it, and added Jack Daniels as a supporting character, just for fun.
If you donate 99 cents to the Save Sheila fund, I'll email you a .pdf copy of Shot of Tequila.
You may now commence with the obvious questions.
Q: Is Shot of Tequila a Jack Daniels novel?
A: No. The protagonist is a mob enforcer named Tequila. Jack Daniels is a supporting character. She appears in several scenes, as does her partner, Herb Benedict.
Q: Is it any good?
A: A few of my writing peers have read it and enjoyed it. The story takes place in 1993. It's sort of like Elmore Leonard on steroids. Readers will meet a younger, less experienced Jack Daniels. Consider it a prequel to her later adventures.
Q: Why are you doing this? Do you really need the $80 that badly?
A: The free ebooks on my website have been downloaded over 10,000 times. On the Amazon.com Shorts program, I have two short stories that have been downloaded thousands of times, and people paid 49 cents for those. I'm curious to see if anyone is willing to pay 99 cents for an original JA Konrath novel.
Q: Do you think people will?
A: No. I think digital media wants to be free. I've heard stories of authors who have made some money charging for downloads, but I don't believe those stories. That's why I'm trying it for myself.
Q: What if I donate 99 cents, then hate the book?
A: You can complain to my wife, the Sheila Killer.
Q: How long is Shot of Tequila?
A: It's 75,000 words. I've formatted it so it prints out at 171 pages, if you prefer printing it to reading it on your computer. You can also read it on your smartphone, Kindle, iPod, Nintendo DS, and pretty much anything else these days. If your dohickey doesn't read .pdf files, you can find a converter online.
Q: Will you post the results of this experiment?
A: Absolutely. I'll keep everyone updated on how many donations I've received. I'm sure there are many authors curious to see if this works.
Q: Can I link to this post and help spread the word?
A: I encourage you to.
Q: I love your blog. You're very generous with your writing advice, and you help keep me motivated. But I think your writing stinks. Can I donate to you without getting a copy of your lousy unpublished book?
A: No.
Q: How fast will I get the book after I donate?
A: There is no automatic download system in place. The ebooks are sent by me one at a time. I'll check my email a few times a day, and if I get any donations, I'll send an ebook to the email address that donated to me. If you've donated and haven't gotten a copy, you're welcome to email me and I'll make sure you get one.
Q: You're a popular author, with a few hundred thousand books in print, and your blog gets thousands of hits a week. Don't you think you'll make enough to save Sheila?
A: Realistically, no. But time will tell...
People close to me know all about Sheila. My friends, family, and peers have met her on many occasions. Sheila gave me comfort and reassurance. She gave me peace of mind. But most of all, she gave me direction in life. We've had many good years together.
My wife killed her. It wasn't jealousy. It was negligence. She shoved Sheila into the glove compartment and cracked her touch screen.
Sheila was my GPS unit, a Garmin c330.
Way back in 2005, I was one of the first authors to use a GPS on a book tour. I preached incessantly about how every writer needed one, and many peers bought their own at my insistence.
But now, Sheila is cracked and useless. No more will I hear her tell me to turn left in 200 feet. No more will her sweet voice say she's lost satellite reception. No more, when I veer off course, will she replot my route while chiding me with her terse, "Recalculating."
Personally, with all the free publicity I've given Garmin, I think they should buy me a new one. But, alas, my calls have gone unanswered.
Which leads me to you, my fans and blog readers. I want you to help me get Sheila back.
While it would be cool if some uberfan just sent me a new GPS, I'm too jaded to believe that will happen. I could just spring for the $80 to get her fixed, but that would deny me the opportunity to try an experiment.
Readers of this blog know how I love experiments. The Internet is a fantastic source of information and entertainment, and it's also a way to make money. But few writers have been able to fuse the two.
So here's what I propose.
I've begun a Save Sheila fund. If you've ever benefited from my blog, or enjoyed my writing, I'm humbly asking you to donate 99 cents by clicking on the button below. It will lead you to my website, which will allow you to donate using PayPal.
PayPal is safe, free, and most people already have an account. If you don't, it's free to sign up for one at www.PayPal.com. The direct link to the donation page is http://www.jakonrath.com/tequila.htm.
Naturally, I don't expect anyone to give something without getting something in return. In fact, I don't expect anyone to give me anything no matter what they get in return. But this is an experiment, and I'm interested to see how it turns out, so I'm giving it a shot.
Everyone who donates 99 cents to the Save Sheila fund will get an ebook from me, emailed to them.
"But Joe," you're probably saying to yourself, "you've already got several free ebooks that can be downloaded on your website. Why should I give you a buck when I'm already getting the freebies?"
Because, dear reader, I'm offering to give you an ebook that isn't on my website.
I wrote nine unpublished novels before landing a book deal with my first Jack Daniels thriller, Whiskey Sour. Three of these novels are available for free on my website, www.jakonrath.com. Many times, readers have clamored for my other unpublished work, and I've always rebuffed them, claiming my early books aren't fit for human consumption.
Well, I've been lying. One of those earlier books is decent. And fans of my Jack Daniels novels might find it interesting, because it has Jack Daniels in it.
The book is called Shot of Tequila. I wrote it in 1997. It's a crime thriller. I actually had an agent who was interested in it, but he ultimately passed, saying it had too much action in it.
I know, I don't understand that comment either.
In 2008, I reread the book, and was surprised to find out it was pretty good. So I rewrote some scenes, polished it, and added Jack Daniels as a supporting character, just for fun.
If you donate 99 cents to the Save Sheila fund, I'll email you a .pdf copy of Shot of Tequila.
You may now commence with the obvious questions.
Q: Is Shot of Tequila a Jack Daniels novel?
A: No. The protagonist is a mob enforcer named Tequila. Jack Daniels is a supporting character. She appears in several scenes, as does her partner, Herb Benedict.
Q: Is it any good?
A: A few of my writing peers have read it and enjoyed it. The story takes place in 1993. It's sort of like Elmore Leonard on steroids. Readers will meet a younger, less experienced Jack Daniels. Consider it a prequel to her later adventures.
Q: Why are you doing this? Do you really need the $80 that badly?
A: The free ebooks on my website have been downloaded over 10,000 times. On the Amazon.com Shorts program, I have two short stories that have been downloaded thousands of times, and people paid 49 cents for those. I'm curious to see if anyone is willing to pay 99 cents for an original JA Konrath novel.
Q: Do you think people will?
A: No. I think digital media wants to be free. I've heard stories of authors who have made some money charging for downloads, but I don't believe those stories. That's why I'm trying it for myself.
Q: What if I donate 99 cents, then hate the book?
A: You can complain to my wife, the Sheila Killer.
Q: How long is Shot of Tequila?
A: It's 75,000 words. I've formatted it so it prints out at 171 pages, if you prefer printing it to reading it on your computer. You can also read it on your smartphone, Kindle, iPod, Nintendo DS, and pretty much anything else these days. If your dohickey doesn't read .pdf files, you can find a converter online.
Q: Will you post the results of this experiment?
A: Absolutely. I'll keep everyone updated on how many donations I've received. I'm sure there are many authors curious to see if this works.
Q: Can I link to this post and help spread the word?
A: I encourage you to.
Q: I love your blog. You're very generous with your writing advice, and you help keep me motivated. But I think your writing stinks. Can I donate to you without getting a copy of your lousy unpublished book?
A: No.
Q: How fast will I get the book after I donate?
A: There is no automatic download system in place. The ebooks are sent by me one at a time. I'll check my email a few times a day, and if I get any donations, I'll send an ebook to the email address that donated to me. If you've donated and haven't gotten a copy, you're welcome to email me and I'll make sure you get one.
Q: You're a popular author, with a few hundred thousand books in print, and your blog gets thousands of hits a week. Don't you think you'll make enough to save Sheila?
A: Realistically, no. But time will tell...
Jumat, 13 Februari 2009
I'm Better Than You
I'm a much better writer than you are.
Sure, I know that taste is subjective. But if we could wave a magic wand and strip away personal taste and bias, leaving only the raw, core elements of what makes writing good, everyone would know the truth: That I'm the greatest writer to ever live.
It doesn't matter if other writers make more money. They got lucky, and good for them. But my writing is better than theirs.
It doesn't matter if other writers sell more books. That's all dependent on the publisher, and how big a marketing budget a book has. It doesn't make their books better than mine.
It doesn't matter if other writers win more awards, or get better reviews. That's all subjective. On a level playing field, if we stripped away the bias and nepotism, I'm better than all of them.
I shouldn't ever say this in public, of course. People will think I'm an ass. An egomaniac. A deluded know-it-all. They'll question my grasp of reality, and try their best to cut me down, to prove me wrong.
In fact, they might try to cut me down even if I never speak of how great I am. That's okay. They're envious, or ignorant, or unhappy with their own lives. A writer as magnificent as I am can't be bothered with petty people.
But the undeniable fact remains. I am the greatest writer who ever lived. I am a legend. I am a god.
I have to believe this. I have to believe this with all of my heart and soul. How else could I keep sitting down, day after day at my computer, forcing out prose that might never ever sell?
I know I'm the best. How else could I keep my sanity in a crumbling marketplace and a volatile industry?
I'm superhuman. How else could I justify the time, the money, the blood and sweat and toil and tears I've shed pursuing this profession? How else could I believe that someday I will land that megadeal, and hit that bestseller list, and win those awards, and get those great reviews?
Do you really think I'd get anything done if I believed I sucked?
But that is irrelevant. I don't suck. I'm incredible.
Every time I struggle through a tough scene, wrack my brain for a plot complication, send yet another baby out into the world to be ridiculed and rejected, the only thing that keeps me going is my unwavering faith in myself.
I. Am. The. Best.
And if you don't think you're the best, quit now. Once you begin to doubt yourself, you get eaten alive.
I encourage all of you to gape in awe at the greatest writer in the universe. I command that you gaze into this writer's eyes and see the creative genius simmering within. The writer that towers above all others. The writer that will conquer the world.
Go. Do it now. Look at this magnificent writer.
Hint: You'll need a mirror.
Sure, I know that taste is subjective. But if we could wave a magic wand and strip away personal taste and bias, leaving only the raw, core elements of what makes writing good, everyone would know the truth: That I'm the greatest writer to ever live.
It doesn't matter if other writers make more money. They got lucky, and good for them. But my writing is better than theirs.
It doesn't matter if other writers sell more books. That's all dependent on the publisher, and how big a marketing budget a book has. It doesn't make their books better than mine.
It doesn't matter if other writers win more awards, or get better reviews. That's all subjective. On a level playing field, if we stripped away the bias and nepotism, I'm better than all of them.
I shouldn't ever say this in public, of course. People will think I'm an ass. An egomaniac. A deluded know-it-all. They'll question my grasp of reality, and try their best to cut me down, to prove me wrong.
In fact, they might try to cut me down even if I never speak of how great I am. That's okay. They're envious, or ignorant, or unhappy with their own lives. A writer as magnificent as I am can't be bothered with petty people.
But the undeniable fact remains. I am the greatest writer who ever lived. I am a legend. I am a god.
I have to believe this. I have to believe this with all of my heart and soul. How else could I keep sitting down, day after day at my computer, forcing out prose that might never ever sell?
I know I'm the best. How else could I keep my sanity in a crumbling marketplace and a volatile industry?
I'm superhuman. How else could I justify the time, the money, the blood and sweat and toil and tears I've shed pursuing this profession? How else could I believe that someday I will land that megadeal, and hit that bestseller list, and win those awards, and get those great reviews?
Do you really think I'd get anything done if I believed I sucked?
But that is irrelevant. I don't suck. I'm incredible.
Every time I struggle through a tough scene, wrack my brain for a plot complication, send yet another baby out into the world to be ridiculed and rejected, the only thing that keeps me going is my unwavering faith in myself.
I. Am. The. Best.
And if you don't think you're the best, quit now. Once you begin to doubt yourself, you get eaten alive.
I encourage all of you to gape in awe at the greatest writer in the universe. I command that you gaze into this writer's eyes and see the creative genius simmering within. The writer that towers above all others. The writer that will conquer the world.
Go. Do it now. Look at this magnificent writer.
Hint: You'll need a mirror.
Jumat, 06 Februari 2009
Con Etiquette
I'll be hanging out at the Love is Murder Mystery Convention over the weekend, and wanted to go over a few ground rules and some quickie dos and don'ts.
Should You Go? I believe writing conferences are one of the only times it's okay for an author to spend money (we all know money flows toward the writer, not away.)
Unfortunately, many of them are out of state, travel and hotels are expensive, and the conference admission can cost anywhere from $100 to $500 dollars.
But there are several big reasons why newbie and pro authors should attend these events.
Networking. Meeting fellow professionals keeps you foremost in their mind when projects arise. Publishing, like all other businesses, is about people.
Camaraderie. While networking is about business, camaraderie is about hanging around with like-minded individuals. Socializing with writers is part of being a writers.
Panels. Being on them if you're a pro, watching them if you're a newbie. If done an extensive post on this before. http://jakonrath.blogspot.com/2006/09/conference-tips.html
Pitching. Any decent conference has agents and editors there. An in-person pitch gets you on top of the slush pile if they ask to take a look--your submission becomes solicited rather than unsolicited, and the agent/editor has a face to go along with a name.
Fans. I put this last, because unless you're already a bestseller, you won't be signing a lot of books. But meeting fans in person is powerful juju, and a handshake and a few kind words will likely be remembered for a long time.
If you have decided to attend a convention, here are some tips.
DO hang out at the bar. This is the best place to meet and mingle, and much more relaxed than anyplace else at the con. If you're buying drinks, you can ask anyone a question or bend their ear for a few minutes, even bigshot editors, authors, and agents.
DON'T get sloppy drunk. It will be remembered, and talked about.
DO wear business casual. The better you look, the better you'll feel.
DON'T be nervous. Everyone was a newbie once, and no one cares if you're perfect.
DO buy books. We're all in this together. If you're an author, buying books is also a great way to get in good with the bookseller.
DON'T talk too much. We learn by listening, not talking, and you're probably not as interesting as you think you are. Or as I am. :)
DO introduce yourself to strangers or people you know from their reputation and/or online. Sit at strange tables during communal lunches. Chat up people in elevators. Smile a lot.
DON'T hang out with the same crowd over and over and over. Yes, hang out with them, but don't limit yourself to only them.
DO pass out business cards, and ask for them in return. That means have some made if you don't have any. They should have your email and website on them--name and phone number isn't necessary.
DON'T sell hard. Conferences are about creating good will, not cramming your books down people's throats. A soft sell is okay, if kept to under 20 seconds, and if you're not doing it all the damn time.
DO thank whoever is running the con. It's an awful burden, and they deserve a pat on the back.
DON'T make any concrete plans. Cons are very liquid, and often you don't know what panels you'll watch, who you'll be hanging out with, or where you'll end up. Go with the flow.
Finally, remember to set goals.
While you don't need to figure out ahead of time what you'll be doing for every second, you should have reasons for attending the con. This isn't vacation time. It's business. You should know who you want to meet, what you want to accomplish, and have a mental checklist of reasons why you're attending in the first place.
Selling 100 books and asking JA Konrath to blurb you isn't a realistic goal. Shaking 100 hands and buying JA a drink is a much better goal, and within your power.
Like all aspects of writing, convention-going is both fun and hard work. The better prepared you are, the more realistic your expectations, and the fun should outweigh the work.
And if you see me, I like microbrewed beer and quality bourbon. Buy me enough and you might get that blurb after all...
Should You Go? I believe writing conferences are one of the only times it's okay for an author to spend money (we all know money flows toward the writer, not away.)
Unfortunately, many of them are out of state, travel and hotels are expensive, and the conference admission can cost anywhere from $100 to $500 dollars.
But there are several big reasons why newbie and pro authors should attend these events.
Networking. Meeting fellow professionals keeps you foremost in their mind when projects arise. Publishing, like all other businesses, is about people.
Camaraderie. While networking is about business, camaraderie is about hanging around with like-minded individuals. Socializing with writers is part of being a writers.
Panels. Being on them if you're a pro, watching them if you're a newbie. If done an extensive post on this before. http://jakonrath.blogspot.com/2006/09/conference-tips.html
Pitching. Any decent conference has agents and editors there. An in-person pitch gets you on top of the slush pile if they ask to take a look--your submission becomes solicited rather than unsolicited, and the agent/editor has a face to go along with a name.
Fans. I put this last, because unless you're already a bestseller, you won't be signing a lot of books. But meeting fans in person is powerful juju, and a handshake and a few kind words will likely be remembered for a long time.
If you have decided to attend a convention, here are some tips.
DO hang out at the bar. This is the best place to meet and mingle, and much more relaxed than anyplace else at the con. If you're buying drinks, you can ask anyone a question or bend their ear for a few minutes, even bigshot editors, authors, and agents.
DON'T get sloppy drunk. It will be remembered, and talked about.
DO wear business casual. The better you look, the better you'll feel.
DON'T be nervous. Everyone was a newbie once, and no one cares if you're perfect.
DO buy books. We're all in this together. If you're an author, buying books is also a great way to get in good with the bookseller.
DON'T talk too much. We learn by listening, not talking, and you're probably not as interesting as you think you are. Or as I am. :)
DO introduce yourself to strangers or people you know from their reputation and/or online. Sit at strange tables during communal lunches. Chat up people in elevators. Smile a lot.
DON'T hang out with the same crowd over and over and over. Yes, hang out with them, but don't limit yourself to only them.
DO pass out business cards, and ask for them in return. That means have some made if you don't have any. They should have your email and website on them--name and phone number isn't necessary.
DON'T sell hard. Conferences are about creating good will, not cramming your books down people's throats. A soft sell is okay, if kept to under 20 seconds, and if you're not doing it all the damn time.
DO thank whoever is running the con. It's an awful burden, and they deserve a pat on the back.
DON'T make any concrete plans. Cons are very liquid, and often you don't know what panels you'll watch, who you'll be hanging out with, or where you'll end up. Go with the flow.
Finally, remember to set goals.
While you don't need to figure out ahead of time what you'll be doing for every second, you should have reasons for attending the con. This isn't vacation time. It's business. You should know who you want to meet, what you want to accomplish, and have a mental checklist of reasons why you're attending in the first place.
Selling 100 books and asking JA Konrath to blurb you isn't a realistic goal. Shaking 100 hands and buying JA a drink is a much better goal, and within your power.
Like all aspects of writing, convention-going is both fun and hard work. The better prepared you are, the more realistic your expectations, and the fun should outweigh the work.
And if you see me, I like microbrewed beer and quality bourbon. Buy me enough and you might get that blurb after all...
Kamis, 29 Januari 2009
Your Tack Hammer
A while ago I did a post on Internet Billboards.
Recently I was talking with a writing buddy, and he asked, "I've on Facebook, now what the hell am I supposed to do with it?"
Like I always do, I made an analogy.
If you're making furniture, one of the tools you'll need is a tack hammer. The average Joe doesn't own a tack hammer, and doesn't need a tack hammer, because it's a specialized tool for a specific job.
Sure, a tack hammer can be probably be used for other applications. But it's used best by someone who understands what it should be used for. Don't buy one if you have no idea why you need it, because if you don't know why you need it, you won't use it properly.
MySpace, Facebook, Twitter, and many other billboards, are tack hammers. Specific tools for specific purposes.
And let me be 100% clear here that the specific purpose of billboards isn't to sell books.
Facebook isn't going to get you on the bestseller list. Yet many writers feel they need a Facebook page, so they set one up and then wonder what the hell the point is.
The point of these billboards is twofold.
First, it enlarges your Internet footprint. The more places you are, the more people are likely to find you.
Second, it makes it easier for people to stay connected to you. The more you remain in the forefront of people's minds, the better off your brand is.
As a writer, you are both a spokesperson and a product. Your book is also a product, but effective salesmanship is about selling you as much as it is about selling your book.
The majority of people who buy your book won't know you. But the Internet has shown that the number of people who can know you has increased tremendously.
For the first time in history, the distance between author and reader is a simple mouse click.
It is to a writer's advantage to befriend as many folks as possible, because you are the product as much as your books are.
But just owning the tack hammer doesn't mean you can automatically build furniture.
In order to enlarge your Internet footprint, broaden brand awareness and name recognition, and keep connected with people, you have to put in some time.
As I've said before, people are looking for two things on the net: information and entertainment. Your billboards should provide both.
But social interaction is also a form of entertainment. And it's a powerful one. I know, because it works on me, so I'm sure it works on others.
Last week, I got a Facebook recommendation to befriend Gary Brandner. Gary is a horror writer (he wrote The Howling, among many other great novels) and I have a dozen of his books on my shelf.
I hadn't thought about Mr. Brandner in years, but seeing that recommendation made me befriend him, and that led to me writing him a short email saying how much I enjoyed his work. That led to him kindly responding to my email, which made me feel all happy and fanboyish. So I wrote back, telling him which books of his I owned, asking if I missed any.
Gary mentioned one I missed. I went out and bought it.
All because of Facebook.
I'm sure this happens a lot. Knowing about an author and enjoying his books often leads to sales. But actually hearing directly from an author is even more powerful.
That means you have to do more than just post some pics and stories on your billboards. It means making an effort to communicate and correspond.
Answering messages, leaving comments, replying to email, befriending people, keeping your billboards updated, staying current, initiating contact; these are all effective ways to wield that tack hammer.
So wield away.
Recently I was talking with a writing buddy, and he asked, "I've on Facebook, now what the hell am I supposed to do with it?"
Like I always do, I made an analogy.
If you're making furniture, one of the tools you'll need is a tack hammer. The average Joe doesn't own a tack hammer, and doesn't need a tack hammer, because it's a specialized tool for a specific job.
Sure, a tack hammer can be probably be used for other applications. But it's used best by someone who understands what it should be used for. Don't buy one if you have no idea why you need it, because if you don't know why you need it, you won't use it properly.
MySpace, Facebook, Twitter, and many other billboards, are tack hammers. Specific tools for specific purposes.
And let me be 100% clear here that the specific purpose of billboards isn't to sell books.
Facebook isn't going to get you on the bestseller list. Yet many writers feel they need a Facebook page, so they set one up and then wonder what the hell the point is.
The point of these billboards is twofold.
First, it enlarges your Internet footprint. The more places you are, the more people are likely to find you.
Second, it makes it easier for people to stay connected to you. The more you remain in the forefront of people's minds, the better off your brand is.
As a writer, you are both a spokesperson and a product. Your book is also a product, but effective salesmanship is about selling you as much as it is about selling your book.
The majority of people who buy your book won't know you. But the Internet has shown that the number of people who can know you has increased tremendously.
For the first time in history, the distance between author and reader is a simple mouse click.
It is to a writer's advantage to befriend as many folks as possible, because you are the product as much as your books are.
But just owning the tack hammer doesn't mean you can automatically build furniture.
In order to enlarge your Internet footprint, broaden brand awareness and name recognition, and keep connected with people, you have to put in some time.
As I've said before, people are looking for two things on the net: information and entertainment. Your billboards should provide both.
But social interaction is also a form of entertainment. And it's a powerful one. I know, because it works on me, so I'm sure it works on others.
Last week, I got a Facebook recommendation to befriend Gary Brandner. Gary is a horror writer (he wrote The Howling, among many other great novels) and I have a dozen of his books on my shelf.
I hadn't thought about Mr. Brandner in years, but seeing that recommendation made me befriend him, and that led to me writing him a short email saying how much I enjoyed his work. That led to him kindly responding to my email, which made me feel all happy and fanboyish. So I wrote back, telling him which books of his I owned, asking if I missed any.
Gary mentioned one I missed. I went out and bought it.
All because of Facebook.
I'm sure this happens a lot. Knowing about an author and enjoying his books often leads to sales. But actually hearing directly from an author is even more powerful.
That means you have to do more than just post some pics and stories on your billboards. It means making an effort to communicate and correspond.
Answering messages, leaving comments, replying to email, befriending people, keeping your billboards updated, staying current, initiating contact; these are all effective ways to wield that tack hammer.
So wield away.
Sabtu, 24 Januari 2009
The Writer As Spendthrift
There are a lot of people who want to separate a writer from her money.
Let's face it; getting published is a goal for many people, but it's such a difficult goal to attain it borders on being a dream.
Dreams don't normally come true. But people will pay big bucks to keep the dream alive.
This morning I'm teaching a one day class at the College of Dupage called "How to Get Published." (Oddly enough, I'm filling in for another teacher who, to my knowledge, has published very little.)
It's an adult eduction class, only a few hours long, and costs less than fifty bucks.
For the students, it's a good deal. I know a lot about the biz, and am good at sharing what I know.
But I am a notable exception. Many writing teachers have never been published by a major house. Many don't have agents.
Yet every college has writing teachers who are willing to take your money and teach you theory they've never practiced.
The bookshelves are crammed full of books about how to write killer query letters and bestsellers. But I only know a handful out of hundreds that were actually written by bestselling authors.
Pick up a writing magazine, or surf the Internet, and you'll find many things to spend money on besides classes and how-to books.
Freelance editors. Book doctors. Fee charging agents. Vanity presses. Self-publishing. Contests. Seminars. Conferences. Conventions.
Joe's advice: Writers are supposed to make money, not spend money.
Unfortunately, because writing is such a hard business to break into, many feel that if they spend some money on the aforementioned things, they'll better their odds.
In practically all cases, no. And you are not the exception to this rule. Trust me.
Today, my students are going to get their money's worth in the first 30 seconds of class, when I tell them:
DON'T SPEND MONEY ON ANYTHING TO GET PUBLISHED.
I do add that there are a few small exceptions. Taking a writing class or two isn't a waste of money if the teacher is an industry pro. You can learn a lot from industry pros. But many of these pros also have tips on their website that are 100% free.
All writers should own copies of Stephen King's On Writing, David Morrell's Lessons From A Lifetime or Writing, and a few notable others.
Conferences and conventions are a great place to meet agents, editors, and peers, and networking is just as important in this biz as in any other.
But even these exceptions come with warnings.
If you're taking a bunch of writing classes, chances are you're wasting your time and money. You could be writing instead, and joining a writing group will make you a better writer without costing a penny. There is probably a writers group already at your local library, bookstore, or college. Ask. If there isn't one, start one.
Owning too many how-to books means you're spending too much time reading about writing instead of actually writing.
I know many folks with procrastinitis. They cloak themselves in the trappings of all things literary, spends scads of money pursuing their dream, fantasizing about it constantly. Yet they rarely sit their ass in the chair and write.
If you're going to more than two conventions a year and you aren't published yet you're chasing a dream, not a goal.
As for the other things I mentioned:
Don't enter contests you have to pay for. If your story is good enough to win, it's good enough to sell.
Don't ever pay anyone to help you edit, fix, or rewrite your prose. Learn to do it yourself. I don't know a single author published by a major house who had paid help.
Don't pay an agent anything, ever. Agents don't need to have any sort of license or accreditation, and bad ones abound. For a list of good ones, visit www.aar-online.org.
Don't pay to have your work published. Why not? Visit your local bookstore. Look around. None of the authors on those shelves paid to have their books published. If you pay to be published, you won't be on those shelves.
Since I'm fond of analogies, here's a good one:
When you're learning how to walk, you don't take classes. You don't read how-to books. You don't pay experts to help you, or do it for you.
You just keep falling until you learn on your own.
It's the same thing with writing.
I just saved you fifty bucks. Or perhaps a heck of a lot more.
You can show your appreciation by buying a bunch of my books. Because there is one thing that all writers should spend money on, and that's supporting each other. If you're writing fiction, and you haven't read at least a hundred novels, you haven't learned enough about craft to succeed.
And if you're curious as to what other bon mots I'll toss out in class today, here's a list of Joe Konrath quotes on writing, publishing, and marketing, free of charge:
There's a word for a writer who never gives up... published.
Before you make the key, study the lock.
People would rather fight to the death to defend their beliefs than sit down quietly and question them.
It's about what you have to offer, not what you have to sell.
You have a better chance of getting struck by lightning than landing a publishing deal. But if you really want to get hit by lightning, you can improve your odds.
No one is entitled to anything.
What are the last ten books you bought, and what made you buy them? Use those techniques to sell your books to other people. Do what works on you.
Hard work trumps talent. Persistence trumps inspiration. Humility trumps ego.
Praise is like candy. We love it, but it isn't good for us. You can only improve by being told what's wrong.
Your book is your child. You can't recognize its shortcomings, any more than a proud parent can consider their child dumb and ugly.
The experts don't know everything, and they might not know what's right for you.
Fate is a future you didn't try hard enough to change.
Anyone looking for you can find you. Get them to find you when they're looking for something else.
Life gives you wonderful opportunities to conquer fears, learn skills, and master techniques. "I can't" shouldn't be synonymous with "I don't want to."
People seek out two things: information and entertainment. Offer them freely, and they'll find you.
The Internet isn't temporary. What you post today can lead people to you decades from now.
Writing is a profession. Act professional.
Always follow the advice of an editor, even if you don't agree, because then your book becomes our book. A editor will fight harder to champion our book.
No one said it would be fair, fun, or easy. But it is worthwhile.
We're all in the same boat. Start rowing.
If you can quit, quit. If you can't quit, stop complaining--this is what you chose.
There are a lot of things that happen beyond your control. Your goals should be within your control.
Just because something is publishable doesn't mean it will get published.
Write when you can. Finish what your start. Edit what you finish. Submit what you've edited. Repeat.
The most successful people on the planet have one thing in common: nothing can stop them. Don't expect to reach your goals without sacrificing things that are important to you. You can't be both happy and ambitious.
Being your own best advocate is about understanding how people react to you.
Fake confidence, and real confidence follows.
Maybe you can't win. But you sure as hell can try.
It's your name on your book cover. It's your responsibility to sell your book. If it flops, your publisher will still be in business, but you won't.
Always have two hands reaching out. One, for your next goal. The other, to help people get to where you're at.
If you can't be smart or funny, be brief.
If you're not in love with the sound of your own voice, how can you expect anyone else to ever be?
Knowing you're not original is the first step in becoming unique.
And if one of those doesn't get me into Bartlett's Familiar Quotations sometime before I die, when I do die I'm going to haunt the Bartlett family...
Let's face it; getting published is a goal for many people, but it's such a difficult goal to attain it borders on being a dream.
Dreams don't normally come true. But people will pay big bucks to keep the dream alive.
This morning I'm teaching a one day class at the College of Dupage called "How to Get Published." (Oddly enough, I'm filling in for another teacher who, to my knowledge, has published very little.)
It's an adult eduction class, only a few hours long, and costs less than fifty bucks.
For the students, it's a good deal. I know a lot about the biz, and am good at sharing what I know.
But I am a notable exception. Many writing teachers have never been published by a major house. Many don't have agents.
Yet every college has writing teachers who are willing to take your money and teach you theory they've never practiced.
The bookshelves are crammed full of books about how to write killer query letters and bestsellers. But I only know a handful out of hundreds that were actually written by bestselling authors.
Pick up a writing magazine, or surf the Internet, and you'll find many things to spend money on besides classes and how-to books.
Freelance editors. Book doctors. Fee charging agents. Vanity presses. Self-publishing. Contests. Seminars. Conferences. Conventions.
Joe's advice: Writers are supposed to make money, not spend money.
Unfortunately, because writing is such a hard business to break into, many feel that if they spend some money on the aforementioned things, they'll better their odds.
In practically all cases, no. And you are not the exception to this rule. Trust me.
Today, my students are going to get their money's worth in the first 30 seconds of class, when I tell them:
DON'T SPEND MONEY ON ANYTHING TO GET PUBLISHED.
I do add that there are a few small exceptions. Taking a writing class or two isn't a waste of money if the teacher is an industry pro. You can learn a lot from industry pros. But many of these pros also have tips on their website that are 100% free.
All writers should own copies of Stephen King's On Writing, David Morrell's Lessons From A Lifetime or Writing, and a few notable others.
Conferences and conventions are a great place to meet agents, editors, and peers, and networking is just as important in this biz as in any other.
But even these exceptions come with warnings.
If you're taking a bunch of writing classes, chances are you're wasting your time and money. You could be writing instead, and joining a writing group will make you a better writer without costing a penny. There is probably a writers group already at your local library, bookstore, or college. Ask. If there isn't one, start one.
Owning too many how-to books means you're spending too much time reading about writing instead of actually writing.
I know many folks with procrastinitis. They cloak themselves in the trappings of all things literary, spends scads of money pursuing their dream, fantasizing about it constantly. Yet they rarely sit their ass in the chair and write.
If you're going to more than two conventions a year and you aren't published yet you're chasing a dream, not a goal.
As for the other things I mentioned:
Don't enter contests you have to pay for. If your story is good enough to win, it's good enough to sell.
Don't ever pay anyone to help you edit, fix, or rewrite your prose. Learn to do it yourself. I don't know a single author published by a major house who had paid help.
Don't pay an agent anything, ever. Agents don't need to have any sort of license or accreditation, and bad ones abound. For a list of good ones, visit www.aar-online.org.
Don't pay to have your work published. Why not? Visit your local bookstore. Look around. None of the authors on those shelves paid to have their books published. If you pay to be published, you won't be on those shelves.
Since I'm fond of analogies, here's a good one:
When you're learning how to walk, you don't take classes. You don't read how-to books. You don't pay experts to help you, or do it for you.
You just keep falling until you learn on your own.
It's the same thing with writing.
I just saved you fifty bucks. Or perhaps a heck of a lot more.
You can show your appreciation by buying a bunch of my books. Because there is one thing that all writers should spend money on, and that's supporting each other. If you're writing fiction, and you haven't read at least a hundred novels, you haven't learned enough about craft to succeed.
And if you're curious as to what other bon mots I'll toss out in class today, here's a list of Joe Konrath quotes on writing, publishing, and marketing, free of charge:
There's a word for a writer who never gives up... published.
Before you make the key, study the lock.
People would rather fight to the death to defend their beliefs than sit down quietly and question them.
It's about what you have to offer, not what you have to sell.
You have a better chance of getting struck by lightning than landing a publishing deal. But if you really want to get hit by lightning, you can improve your odds.
No one is entitled to anything.
What are the last ten books you bought, and what made you buy them? Use those techniques to sell your books to other people. Do what works on you.
Hard work trumps talent. Persistence trumps inspiration. Humility trumps ego.
Praise is like candy. We love it, but it isn't good for us. You can only improve by being told what's wrong.
Your book is your child. You can't recognize its shortcomings, any more than a proud parent can consider their child dumb and ugly.
The experts don't know everything, and they might not know what's right for you.
Fate is a future you didn't try hard enough to change.
Anyone looking for you can find you. Get them to find you when they're looking for something else.
Life gives you wonderful opportunities to conquer fears, learn skills, and master techniques. "I can't" shouldn't be synonymous with "I don't want to."
People seek out two things: information and entertainment. Offer them freely, and they'll find you.
The Internet isn't temporary. What you post today can lead people to you decades from now.
Writing is a profession. Act professional.
Always follow the advice of an editor, even if you don't agree, because then your book becomes our book. A editor will fight harder to champion our book.
No one said it would be fair, fun, or easy. But it is worthwhile.
We're all in the same boat. Start rowing.
If you can quit, quit. If you can't quit, stop complaining--this is what you chose.
There are a lot of things that happen beyond your control. Your goals should be within your control.
Just because something is publishable doesn't mean it will get published.
Write when you can. Finish what your start. Edit what you finish. Submit what you've edited. Repeat.
The most successful people on the planet have one thing in common: nothing can stop them. Don't expect to reach your goals without sacrificing things that are important to you. You can't be both happy and ambitious.
Being your own best advocate is about understanding how people react to you.
Fake confidence, and real confidence follows.
Maybe you can't win. But you sure as hell can try.
It's your name on your book cover. It's your responsibility to sell your book. If it flops, your publisher will still be in business, but you won't.
Always have two hands reaching out. One, for your next goal. The other, to help people get to where you're at.
If you can't be smart or funny, be brief.
If you're not in love with the sound of your own voice, how can you expect anyone else to ever be?
Knowing you're not original is the first step in becoming unique.
And if one of those doesn't get me into Bartlett's Familiar Quotations sometime before I die, when I do die I'm going to haunt the Bartlett family...
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